Back in September, I published Emotional Beats: How to Easily Convert your Writing into Palpable Feelings. As promised, I will be posting the book on my blog. So, here is the next installment, featuring Part 2 of the book: Body Parts. This post deals with what comes…

Out Of The Mouth…

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We all know that “said” is considered the perfect dialogue tag. Still, there are times when someone wishes to convey a feeling through a well-placed verb. Or a beat:

• He started babbling.
• He started prattling off every detail about [object].
• He clicked her tongue.
• He made a tsk-ing noise with his mouth.
• He smacked his lips.
• He spat the words out through gritted teeth. There was frustration and disdain wrapped up in his words.
• His words trailed off.
• She cooed at him.
• Silence enveloped us.
• Beyond that, nothing out of his mouth would sound appropriate, so he left it there.
• “I need more.” His voice broke low on the word.
• Her voice spiked upward as she struggled.
• His tone brooked no argument.
• “It—” She broke off, goggling as vicious curses erupted from the rear of the house.
• “Sure,” she piped up.
• She choked out.
• She croaked.
• His voice was redolent with good breeding: deep, measured, forceful, and with perfect enunciation. It rang out chillingly over her.
• I stretched out the last word for emphasis.
• He let his voice roll over her. It was pleasingly deep-toned.
• …he said, his breath tickling her ear.
• …she said with a windy sigh.
• …she asked, her voice a bare whisper in the night.
• …he said, his voice sweet and smooth like syrup.
• …she said in carefully spaced words.
• …the men said in stereo.

Breath

Another thing that comes out of a mouth is, of course, breath. Here are some nice breath-related beats:

• He let out a breath he hadn’t even realized he was holding.
• With some loud, straining breaths, he [lifted heavy object].
• He waited until [action] before exhaling a deep and relieved breath.
• …drawing in a frustrated breath…
• His breath came out in small puffs of cold air.
• She exhaled.
• He blew out his cheeks.
• She huffed.
• She snorted.
• His tongue felt fuzzy. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d brushed his teeth.
• He caught a whiff of mint.
• He had tobacco-stained teeth that hadn’t seen a toothbrush up close in years, and the breath to prove it.
• His bad breath had nothing on his body odor.
• Her breath escaped soft and moist; a sinless sound; a thing almost pure.

Next week: Head & Shoulders, Knees & Toes. View all posts on the subject, or buy the book on Amazon – free on KU!

Emotional Beats: Head & Shoulders, Knees & Toes

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