From www.behance.net/gallery/15157295/Anagram-Bookshop-Kaspen
The rule is drilled into all of us. We’re not to tell, we’re to show. I was discussing writing rules with MMJaye the other day, and I thought our conversation would interest the rest of you as well.
As anyone who has written even a few words knows, there are many different ways of saying the same thing. Consider the following example:
I met John.
No details, just a simple statement. Telling at its most basic. If we wanted to show our relationship, we could have said:
I met my enemy, John.
Now, let’s embellish that a bit, in the simplest way possible:
I greeted my enemy, John.
Simply by changing the verb, we have created a more descriptive, yet equally simple, phrase. So far, we’re still telling, though. To show, we would need to add some detail:
I shook John’s hand. Hard.
A bit awkward, but we’re moving in the right direction. Now, one of the tricks of modern, trendy writing is to love specifics. So, break down our noun to its most basic components:
My fingers squeezed John’s. Hard.
Almost there. However, we’re still lacking two things: sensory detail and emotional tells. What more can we learn about the encounter?
I squeezed John’s fingers. Hard. His signet ring dug into my flesh, but I ignored the pain.
A simple encounter has suddenly come alive with emotion and innuendo. The reader realizes that that John and I have an adversarial relationship, without the author actually stating the fact. A signet ring implies wealth, prestige. And my ignoring the pain implies I hate him enough to want to do something about it.
Explanation
So, why is this style of writing so popular? My personal explanation is that it’s due to movie influences. Readers are used to watching the story unfold on screen, not having it narrated to them. Books written in a telling style can come across as a David Attenborough documentary. I mean, we’re already watching the tiger eat the gazelle. We don’t need David’s soothing voice informing us of the fact.
Drawbacks
Like all good things, the technique has certain drawbacks, usually not mentioned in writing courses. Namely, showing is usually more verbose that telling. Consider the following example:
From totara2013.weebly.com
Is Showing more evocative? Definitely. Is it more effective? It depends. You may not want to use a whole paragraph where a simple line might suffice, especially during expositions or simple descriptions. There comes a point when we fall into the trap of writing for writing’s sake. Which is a much more serious offense, in my book (silly pun intended), than telling.
So, as with everything, use your judgment, and don’t let your writing get in the way of your story-telling.
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Awesome info as always! 🙂
Thank you, I’m glad you found it useful! 🙂
Reblogged this on The Way of the Storyteller:.
Reblogged this on jokondotnet.
Great post Nicholas. I think there’s room for both techniques, when the scene calls for it. Of course, showing and not telling requires a great deal more thought and clever writing. After all, this is what we’re all aiming for 😀
You’re right. I long for the day when it all comes natural to me, instead of having to struggle… 🙂
Same here! 😀
Another excellent article, Nicholas. Great examples!
As you and other commentators have pointed out, many are under the wrong assumption that telling is always bad. But there’s definitely a place for it!
Thanks Nat, I’m glad you enjoyed it. It’s high praise coming from an author whose work I love so much! 🙂
Great post! Hate wordiness just for the sake of it, it makes ‘show’ as boring to read as ‘tell’. As with all things, balance and a happy medium is what we must strive for.
Couldn’t have put it better myself. Sadly, all too often showing becomes showing for its own sake. As I always say, “don’t let your writing get in the way of your story.”
Yeah… I can think of a place in my second book where that might have happened… sigh! Always learning…
Believe me, I’m not casting any stones… 😀
So far I’ve only read one of your books (BTW, you need to go and bloody approve that review, its still pending!) but I certainly wouldn’t accuse you of that! Your others are on my list… I’ll let you know hehe!
What review?? What are you talking about? Where have you left it? 😮
Book Vetter! I don’t think I can post a book Vetter review on my blog…can I? Will have to check that. I think it becomes their property.
No, you can’t. I don’t think they allow me to approve a review before I’ve posted half a dozen of my own, hence my being unaware of this… Sorry – and thank you so much for reading and reviewing my work!! 🙂
No problem… the pleasure is all mine!
Aw, that’s so sweet of you. Who’s got the silver tongue now? 😉
I love your layered approach. That’s pretty much the exact process I go through while editing a piece. So often we hear, “show don’t tell” without any sort of qualifying, concrete example to explain to us what that looks like. Striking a balance between the two is key.
Exactly. They’re both useful; not everything can – or should – be showed. They both have their place in our writing, even if showing is considered trendier.
Thanks, Nicholas… a post that makes one think, and a truly effective one! I have always believed in the ‘show not tell’ concept! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on the subject!
Deepti, so wonderful to see you here! Thank you for visiting!
I’m almost through your book – I love it! Many thanks again for sharing it with me. I’ll send you the review within the week 🙂
Reblogged this on theowlladyblog.
Such a great topic since if so often comes down to finding the right balance. (We never have these discusions abot speling, do we?)
I’m pretty tolerant of telling, particularly when it comes to exposition. No need to add a whole scene of dialog to give me a paragraph of back-story that the character can simply muse on for a moment.
To me, telling becomes a noticeable problem under a couple circumstances: 1) when it goes on too long, and 2) when we lose the character’s voice or pov. I’m completely popped out of a story when all of a sudden the author steps in to give me a little background info. Other than those…I’m almost always good to go.
You’re absolutely right. The whole point of these writing techniques is to further immerse the reader into our story. The real rule here is, avoid anything that jars them out of our world!
This is very helpful. I’ve struggled with this forever. I’m now convinced that it’s my job to decide when to use either technique. I can relate this to plants and payoffs. If I need readers to know about the revolver in the top drawer, I need to make it stick. Then when it gets used four chapters later, they will remember. When I need some sensory showing, I will try to use it for my purposes at the right time. My hope is the showing has a purpose down the road.
Lol! I thought of you Craig, as I was reading this! Visions of a red cart come to mind…
Interesting point. Yes, making a point about something memorable is a great example.
Fabulous as always. I also believe showing draws the reader in more. :star:
Thanks! Yes, it usually does. Sometimes it can get obtrusive, though. It’s up to us to use it properly.
Sigh. Handle with care. 🙂
Hi Nicholas, I love the way you’ve captured both the good and the bad sides of “show don’t tell.” Definite food for thought. And thank you for the laugh with the young police car. 🙂
Thanks! Yes, the police car photo is hilarious. I can practically hear David’s soothing voiceover! 😀
I have to admit that I cringe whenever I see the phrase because I think people use it without thinking. I’ve met many who say ‘show don’t tell’ when reading a book and they can’t explain what they mean. Somehow, the phrase became a knee-jerk reaction for those wanting to critique writing and sound smart. Not saying all people who say it are doing this, but it gets thrown around with such casualness.
The funny thing is that I think it’s a personal preference too. Everyone has their own limit of show and tell, so it does fall into the category of ‘you can’t please everyone’. I think you have a great point about the movie influence when it comes to this because my friends who are more into movies than books have a different tolerance than the book readers.
It’s true, sometimes this sort of advice is taken on religiously, especially by neophytes. It’s important to understand writing techniques before we can decide how to best use them (or ignore them). I think of them as tools. I am more familiar with a few, others feel natural to me, and with some I struggle.
I tend to struggle with this one because of the present tense style. It comes off as very showy because you’re seeing things unfold instead of reading about things that happened before.
Interesting point, it had never occurred to me that PoV influenced this. Now, I’m like “d’uh! Of course it does!” (slaps head)
I had the same reaction after debating with another author a year ago.
You slapped his head?
It was online, so the best I could do was poke.
I love your writing tips, Nicholas! I loved John Howell’s comment too! Good things to think about when I write. Thank you!
Thanks, Fio! Yes, John’s comment was brilliant! 😀
Alone in thought the author squeezes his cold shrouded fingers to life and taps the keyboard to thank Nicholas for the precious gift of knowledge. (would have said nice post before reading this)
ROFL – John, if there was a “best comment” award you would have won it with this one… 😀
Glad you liked it. Your post inspired my to try harder:-)
Reblogged this on Covey View and commented:
Show, don’t tell advice and more.
Hi – the kraken coming out of the book image comes from The Anagram Bookshop here https://www.behance.net/gallery/15157295/Anagram-Bookshop-Kaspen They’ve got a few other clever models that people might be interested to see.
Thank you so much for the link! It makes me so happy when I can properly credit the creators of a piece of art. I have now updated the link to the correct one 🙂
Fascinating and informative as ever. Many thanks for sharing such a fab piece.
Thank you so much! I’m glad you found it useful 🙂
I did, thanks so much and I shall pop in again. Good luck with all your writing and endeavours 🙂 Thanks for popping in here too.
Excellent piece. I both pinned it on Pinterest and tweeted it. The examples were great.
You’re always so sweet, thank you! 🙂
That’s so funny, I recognized this on my own about a year ago. I don’t know what got me thinking on it, but one day I stopped writing and realized I was simply telling like I was writing a script.
And like you pointed out at the end, there is a fine line between showing and boring with details. Knowing where that line is and knowing the words to use is the tricky part.
Nice!
A big part of learning to write is striking our own balance between these things. It’s tricky, but that’s what finding one’s voice is all about.
Reblogged this on Have We Had Help? and commented:
Show v Tell
I have to slightly disagree with you Nicholas.
Point 1 – show don’t tell isn’t a new concept. It has been around in fiction since the nineteenth century to my knowledge.
Point 2 – show does not have to be verbose. It all depends on the words you choose and how you use them.
A little of both (show and tell) is usually the best way.
😀
Thanks for the comment, Jack!
1. You are right, “show don’t tell” is not a new concept. What has changed is the emphasis placed on it.
2. I guess a master craftsman can show in as few words as possible. Still, telling (eg “she was sad”) will usually be briefer that showing (eg “tears glistened in her eyes”).
Many thanks for the reblog! 🙂
Nicholas, you’ve reprimanded me for using too many examples of ‘tell’. Although I agree, I remember my professors of writing at university insisting on not writing ‘blah blah’. When a writer always shows, he tends, in many cases, to exaggerate – to overdo. The best way would be to combine both and finally rely on your gut feeling
Lol – surely not “reprimanded”! 😀 I merely pointed out that some descriptions in your book probably had more telling than what’s commonly accepted nowadays.
As you point out, both means of writing have their place, and it’s up to each of us to find the right balance between them.
Reblogged this on Versus Blurb and commented:
A good lesson I need to keep in mind…
I really enjoyed this article. I think James Joyce was a master at knowing when to show and when to tell. I still remember his simple words that said it all ‘She was tired’ in Eveline. As a reader I painted my own picture of a tired woman. My intelligence would have been insulted with a showy description of what tired looked like in this case. Thank you for your thoughtful post.
Thanks! I completely agree. There are cases when “show” is just the wrong medium. Experience is all about knowing when these cases are. 🙂
Awesome! Your examples are spot on, and the way you build up into them … Is a course in ots own merit! Maybe start offering courses? And thanks for the shout-out!
Lol – thanks. For now, I’m happy to share what I’m finding out through my posts. But in the future, I’d love to share through courses, books or in any other way I can think of. 🙂
Reblogged this on Memoir Notes.